What is a Judgement?

Teaching a DBT module on judgements recently I realised just how important it is that we become aware of our own internal judgements. 

So what are they? 

An observation is when you notice something using your senses, what you can see, hear, smell, touch, or taste, without adding your opinion.

So if we turn our attention to what a judgment is…

Definition 

“A judgment is when we decide something is good or bad, right or wrong, or true or false, often before we have all the information.”

So instead of just observing using the senses, sight, sound, touch etc, we are applying an opinion, a standard, a value or an expectation on top of our observation. 

Why do we teach about judgements?

We teach that judgement thoughts are often the first accessible signal of inner distress, long before the person can identify a feeling.

If we understand our judgements of ourselves and others it can reduce emotional intensity (if we have access to emotions) and sometimes give us more control over how we act. 

Judgements fuel invalidating inner dialogue. We will perhaps be more prone to shame, self hatred, avoidance or self harm. 

If we can reduce judgments of ourselves this can build self compassion and resilience. 

For example. ‘I should understand this by now’. Should is a judgement word because it implies a standard. Saying we should understand something even when we don’t isn’t helpful because it might make us feel inadequate, confused, send us down a loop of self hatred etc. Instead when we accept we don’t understand something we can be more curious and accepting of ourselves. 

Judgements also interfere with mindfulness practice as they take us from awareness of the present moment. Mindfulness teaches us to observe the present moment without labelling it ‘good’ ‘bad’ ‘wrong’ ‘stupid’ etc. So understanding our judgements can help us to stay grounded and response skilfully instead of reactively. 

Judgements can also damage relationships. For instance ‘she doesn’t like me’ , ‘he is selfish’. They can block curiosity and understanding of each other and often lead to conflicts or miscommunication. 

In Summary

Teaching about judgments helps clients:

• Recognize and reduce emotional     suffering

• Stay present through mindfulness

• Improve relationships

• Practice self-validation

• Think more flexibly